AJ McLean and his biological father reunited after 42 years following some revelations the Backstreet Boys member experienced while undergoing mental health therapy.
Less than a week after the boy band wrapped its world tour in May, McLean, 45, got in his truck and drove to Scottsdale, Ariz., where he “spent 10 weeks doing an intensive, outpatient program for past trauma, PTSD, depression and anxiety.”
“Not so much for my sobriety, ’cause that’s pretty solid,” the pop star, who has been sober for two years, told Pvnew Monday night at The Grove’s annual tree lighting celebration in Los Angeles.
“I go to my meetings regularly, and I’m doing my 12-step program. I got my sponsor. I know that I take it very seriously. But I needed to go to the root of it.”
Though the musician did not divulge the details of his issues or how he worked through them, he said the experience inspired him to reach out to his dad, whom he hadn’t seen since he was 3.
The two had been “talking here and there via text message,” but therapy was “the catalyst” that prompted McLean to reach out and say, “Hey, why don’t we have a little sit-down? I would love to pick your brain. I was told one thing from my mom and my uncle and my other family about how you were.”
The Grammy nominee told us he “wanted to hear it from the horse’s mouth” and make his “own decisions.”
“And that’s what I’m trying to do right now. There is a healthy [form of being] selfish, and I’m making my own choices in life now and making my own decisions,” he shared.
“And hopefully, if I make mistakes, learning from them. I’m not perfect. I don’t want to be perfect. Nobody is.”
McLean — who was joined by daughters Elliott, formerly known as Ava, 10, and Lyric, 6, whom he shares with recently estranged wife Rochelle — highlighted that “a lot is changing” for him, which has included the realization that he can and should separate his career from who he is as a person.
“AJ is a persona. It’s a job. It’s not who I really am. It doesn’t define me,” he told us, noting that he prefers to be called Alex when he’s “not in Backstreet mode.”
In fact, for his forthcoming solo project, he’s debating going by Alexander James. He’s also “launching a clothing company next year” and “expanding [his] beauty line,” Ava Dean.
In addition to making sure his mental health is in check, McLean has also been paying attention to his physical well-being.
“I’ve lost 30 pounds. I’m physically in better shape [now] than when I was 19,” he marveled, explaining that he “mountain bike[s] and work[s] out six days a week.”
The singer-dancer believes he’s able to live a “balanced” life these days because he has his “priorities” in check.
“If I’m not OK, I can’t take care of my family,” he explained. “So [the order is]: my sobriety, God, family, me — and then we’re good.”
McLean beamed as he looked over at his kids before sharing his best piece of parenting advice.
“Don’t sweat the small stuff. Like, you’re gonna wanna pull your hair out sometimes, OK? It just is what it is. But take it all in because before you know it,” he said, pointing at his eldest, “they look like this, and they’re gonna be 11 in a week.”
“But she’ll always be my baby,” he made sure to add.