Sounds “Toxic.”
Britney Spears despised her short stint as a judge on “The X Factor” in 2012 because it filled her with fear and anxiety.
“I think a lot of people are really professional on TV, like Christina Aguilera and Gwen Stefani. When the camera’s on them, they thrive. And that’s great,” Spears writes in her new memoir, “The Woman in Me.”
But the “Gimme More” singer, 41, admits that she lacked the same confidence after being placed under a conservatorship in 2008.
“I used to be able to do that when I was younger, but again, I feel like I age backwards when I’m afraid,” she shares. “And so I got to where I was very, very nervous if I knew I had to be on air, and I didn’t like being nervous all day long.”
Looking back, Spears says she has “accepted” that she is “not cut out” for certain jobs.
“I can tell people who try to push me in that direction no,” she writes.
“I’ve been forced into things I didn’t want to do and been humiliated. It’s not my thing at this point.”
But acting isn’t completely off the table for the “Crossroads” star, who shares that she would be open to a role that requires just one day’s work.
“If you’ve got me a cute cameo on a fun TV show where I’m in and out in a day that’s one thing, but to act skeptical for eight straight hours while judging on TV? Uh, no thank you,” she writes. “I absolutely hated it.”
Spears was a judge on Season 2 of “The X Factor” alongside Simon Cowell, Demi Lovato and L.A. Reid.
While she didn’t return for the third and final season, she was the highest-paid panelist in the show’s history, reeling in a reported $15 million.
Cowell, 64, revealed last year that he begged the “Circus” singer to rejoin the judging panel.
“We spent so long on the phone talking about ‘X Factor’ before we did it,” he told E! News in November 2022, a year after Spears was freed from her 13-year conservatorship.
“There’s a side of Britney a lot of people don’t know. I mean, I was on the phone to her two or three hours every time. She was super smart [and had] lovely ideas about how to launch someone else’s career, which is critical if you’re going to be a judge on one of these shows. So I had a fantastic relationship with her.”
The former “American Idol” judge called Spears “interesting” and “so talented” before making his public plea for her to work with him again.
“If you’re watching Britney and we make a show, please come back and do it with me. It would be amazing. I adore her,” he said.
Cowell even had kind things to say about Spears back when they were peers.
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“[She] is a fascinating person because you just don’t know anything about her,” he told reporters during a conference call in 2012. “She’s very unpredictable. You never know what is going to happen. She has taken this very seriously.”
However, behind the scenes, things didn’t seem all too rosy when sources claimed the “America’s Got Talent” judge wanted to give the Grammy winner the boot for being “boring” instead of “crazy” on the show.
However, another source told TMZ that Spears was leaving the show to focus on her first love.
“Britney loves Simon, she likes Demi Lovato, but her thing is music,” the source said at the time.
Spears’ memoir debuted on Tuesday.
