Colleen Ballinger has addressed her infamous ukulele apology video, posted in June, in which she denied allegations of grooming through song.
In a new video simply titled “fall vlog,” Ballinger returned to YouTube for the first time in four months and acknowledged that the apology was “really embarrassing.”
“Obviously, the last video that I posted on here is really embarrassing, to say the least. I was being accused of some pretty awful things and I just was mad,” Ballinger said in the video. “I should have handled that situation with maturity and empathy, but instead I just let my ego take over and I’m really disappointed in myself.”
Allegations against Ballinger first emerged in 2020, but a NBC News report published in June shed new light on the situation as more members of Ballinger’s online fandom came forward. According to the report, YouTuber Adam McIntyre made a video in 2020 alleging that Ballinger had “formed an inappropriate personal friendship with him while he was between the ages of 13 and 16, which included her sending him lingerie as a joke. He also alleged that Ballinger gave him access to her social media, helped her generate content ideas, and that they exchanged text messages for years.”
Ballinger further responded to the allegations in her new video, saying: “Over the last 15 years of my career, there have been moments where I was immature and inappropriate with some of my comedy. And there were times when I did not put enough thought into my fan interactions. And because of that behavior, people got hurt, and I am so sorry. I never wanted to hurt anybody, but it’s clear that I did and I feel so terrible about that.”
Ballinger ended the video by saying that she plans to continue vlogging on YouTube from now on, and has since posted another video to her channel titled “What I’ve been up to.”
“I am not a perfect person and there are plenty of things in my past that I wish I could go back and redo and fix and change. I don’t have control over any of that and I don’t have control over the things that people say about me, I only have control over my actions moving forward. So I’m going to do everything I can to make sure that I create a positive, kind, inclusive, safe space online with my content,” Ballinger said. “And if you want to be part of my journey online, I would love to have you, and if not I completely understand. I do not expect anyone to welcome me back with open arms, I don’t expect to change anyone’s mind with this video. I just wanted to come on here and say that I’m sorry and I wanted to try to show people that it’s possible for someone to grow and learn and be better after making mistakes many years ago.”
